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GayShay, 15

I've known I was gay since I was young, I've been in many relationships and I've been hurt just as many times as a normal girl. I'm considered a dyke, I wear men's clothing and have short hair. I met this girl a couple months back and fell in love instantly. The problem was that she lives in a whole other state, I loved her and still love her with every bit of my barely beating heart, I broke up with her tonight because she wasn't happy with who I ended up being: sad, depressed and shy. I never used to be any of those things but I wasn't going to keep her from being happy so I let her go. I want to die now, she was the only person that kept me feeling happy. I've never cried like this before and all I can do is think about how I messed everything up and how she's going to move on and I'm still going to be alone. We promised that we'd be together forever and I was positive we were getting married as soon as we could afford it. now I'm left here alone, I don't know what to do.

Whats it Mean ?

  • GayShay, a lot of teenagers go through relationship problems and it is a natural part of adolescence. It is understandable to feel upset over losing someone and this shows how much you actually care.
  • It is hard to hold onto a relationship with someone that is out of state and it makes communication a bigger issue. If you still feel like you want to maintain your relationship with your ex, you can consider calling her and telling her how you feel about the situation.
  • Breaking up with someone because you feel like they will be eventually happier might seem like a good idea, but it can make you feel even worse. You can't be entirely sure that your ex is happier without you unless you communicate with one another, and this is what makes long distance relationships slightly harder.
  • In regards to your depression, it is natural to feel depressed at your age because your hormones are fluctuating constantly, making you feel like you have no one to talk to. You can consider talking to your parents about your depression and see what advice they can give you. There are a lot of options to treat depression and you can have the help and guidance of your parents.
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