alex ...., 14

Stuff Going On

alex ...., 14

I don't really know who I am. I'm sharing two personalities. I'm shy to girls. I'm loud to boys. I don't like boys like that; but I'm loud to them boys. I feel like boys and girls both see me differently. Boys give me a hard time with girls. When I'm trying to make new friends, boys take advantage of me -.- They try to get me to have beer with them while there is this girl I'm trying to make friends with and they know I won't do anything because I'm different to each sex. I'm trying to be myself, but I'm just scared of the impact it would make on my personality. I'm scared of how people would see me.

alex...., it takes time to discover who you really are. It's difficult for a teen to know who they are because they have not had a lot of life experiences. Teens are undergoing many changes, which makes it even more difficult. You are not alone. All teens are going through the same thing.
We all have people in our lives that "trigger" certain attitudes or personality traits in us. You are really shy around girls. That's not unusual at all for a guy your age. Depending on who your siblings are could make all the difference in the world. If you have two brothers, for instance, you might not feel as comfortable around girls. That would be a perfectly natural feeling. You wouldn't have spent a whole lot of time around girls.
You don't appear to have multiple personalities, just different comfort levels with the sexes, that's all. We all experience what you are experiencing at different levels.
You have absolutely nothing to fear. Keep being the guy that you are becoming. You're awesome! It really doesn't matter how others may see you. What counts is how you see yourself. You have to live with yourself 24 hours a day.
You need to realize now that you will never be able to please everyone in this world. The most important thing is to be yourself, and to love who you are, regardless of any shortcomings you may have.